How To Not Lose Yourself In A Relationship: 8 Ways To Avoid Losing Yourself In A Relationship

Relationships are such beautiful experiences. Being in love is really exciting, and it’s simple to let the person you’re falling for entirely devour you. For this reason, it’s crucial to understand how to not lose yourself in a relationship!

Why should you keep part of your freedom and avoid being too involved in a relationship? It’s just not good to lose oneself in a relationship, especially if it’s going to be a long-term (maybe even forever!) engagement.

You want to be true to who you are and keep your relationships and other aspects of your life in a healthy balance. It’s never too late to reconnect with yourself, even if you already feel like you’re losing yourself a little in your relationship.

This advice on how to not lose yourself in a relationship can be helpful for helping you maintain a happy, healthy relationship with your partner and yourself, regardless of whether you’re just starting a new and exciting relationship or you’ve been in a committed, long-term relationship for several years.

Contents

1 HOW TO NOT LOSE YOURSELF IN A RELATIONSHIP

HOW TO NOT LOSE YOURSELF IN A RELATIONSHIP

Learning how to not lose yourself in a relationship ensures you can show up as your best self for your partner

1. DON’T FORGET ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS

It’s only normal for us to want to spend all of our time with someone once we start falling in love, and it happens all too often that in the excitement of a new relationship, old friendships may not receive as much attention as they previously did.

Not only does this make us sorry for our dear friends, but will your pals still be there if you need them later on and can’t rely on your partner? Maybe not if you’ve disregarded these connections in favor of giving your romantic relationship everything you’ve got.

Friendships are just one type of interaction that people require in their life. Just because you have a new romantic bestie doesn’t mean you can take them for granted!

2. KEEP UP WITH HOBBIES

Giving up hobbies and other interests that you don’t share with your spouse is one thing that might cause you to lose yourself in a relationship. While it may be a lot of fun to discover new hobbies and interests that you both love, it’s not healthy to discount personal interests just because they aren’t shared. In actuality, having your own interests is beneficial!

Don’t be scared to keep seeking fulfillment in the hobbies and interests you don’t share since, interestingly enough, couples who support one other in pursuing their own particular hobbies and interests are regarded to be a significant green flag in a relationship.

3. ENGAGE IN SELF CARE

Self-care is crucial, especially if you don’t want to lose yourself in relationships. When we look for ourselves, we are better equipped to be there for our partners.

Self-care in relationships is attending to your own requirements for sleep, diet, time, etc. By making sure you are taking care of yourself, you make sure you can be your best self for your spouse. We all want that, don’t we?

If your partner falls for you, shouldn’t you do what you can to stay true to yourself and who you really are for both yourself and them?

4. HAVE HEALTHY BOUNDARIES

Healthy boundaries have been the subject of much discussion in the relationship community over the past several years, which is good because it means that couples who have healthy boundaries make sure to meet each other as their healthiest, strongest selves. A boundary is a guide to make sure that both of your needs are satisfied in the relationship; it is not a wall.

A communication boundary in a relationship can, for instance, dictate how frequently your significant other can text you while you are at work. If your partner continues to text you while you are at work, you may become agitated and resentful, and trying to talk yourself out of your feelings will not help you or your partner stay healthy and strong. Therefore, you should be honest about how frequently you are comfortable receiving texts during your working hours.

5. HAVE YOUR OWN GOALS

This one is crucial for preserving your individuality while in a relationship! Committed couples should and do have shared life objectives, but they shouldn’t sacrifice their own aspirations in the process. And guess what? Having personal objectives is beneficial!

Personal goals might include those related to your health, job, education, or artistic endeavors, among others, but it’s beneficial for both you and your relationship to have objectives you’re striving toward. Everyone should strive to present their best selves to their spouse, right? A key element of this is setting and pursuing personal objectives.

6. KNOW YOURSELF

This one can sound a little goofy at first, but it’s essential to keep oneself from becoming entangled in relationships! It’s possible that you no longer know who you are by yourself, particularly if you’re a serial monogamist (someone who enters into consecutive committed partnerships).

You don’t have to leave the relationship you’re in, but you do need to work on the one that will last the longest in your life: the one with yourself. What values hold the highest esteem for you? What qualities do you admire about yourself? What areas of yourself do you wish to improve? You can be certain that you are not pouring yourself into a mold that someone else has created for you when you can plainly see who you are.

Staying true to yourself is important in building healthy, happy relationships where no one feels like they’ve lost themself.

7. KNOW YOUR PARTNER

In enticing romantic relationships, we frequently have the propensity to adore our partners and construct an incomplete dream of both them and the connection. The strongest relationships are those in which both partners truly recognize one another as they truly are, sans any illusions.

You’ll feel more at ease letting your spouse see the true you if you can accept them as they are, warts and all, rather than attempting to change who you are to meet their idealized version of you. Honest partnerships are connections that are healthy.

8. MAINTAIN FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE

This is crucial for everyone, but notably for heterosexual women who historically had less financial and personal economic freedom in committed partnerships. Giving up all of your personal autonomy is a prescription for catastrophe, even if your spouse promises to take care of you financially, physically, and emotionally no matter what.

It’s wonderful if your partner wants to foot the bill for date evenings. A lover pressuring you to do something to make up for the date nights they paid for is not very romantic. It’s wonderful if your fiancé tells you that you can leave the job you despise because they can support the two of you. What’s not so nice is if your fiance pushes you to leave a career you love so that you may stay at home.

These are potentially abusive financial practices, and they are difficult to understand. A dependable friend or a therapist might be able to clarify the differences for you if you’re unclear.

As you’ve probably observed by now, many of these strategies for avoiding losing yourself in a relationship are quite similar and overlap in some ways, but at the core of it all is maintaining your independence from your spouse and being loyal to who you are.

To guarantee that you don’t lose yourself in your relationship and that you come across as your strongest and healthiest self, maintain your independence and keep working on yourself. We all want to give our spouses our best effort, right?

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